Lyrics
I’m about Chestnutted, Jingle Belled, and ho ho’d out
There’s a tree in my house
I’m tired of rocking around
Someone’s big ass socks hanging off of the mantle
The whole subdivisions lit up like a roman candle
I’m testifying now, Santa’s my witness
Jesus Christ help me it’s Christmas
Now nothing gives the holiday it’s festive feel
Like the American tradition of a big arms deal
So let’s see what Uncle Samy Claus has
In a slaying sleigh tonight, shall we
Egypt– under the tree is 5 billion
For Hell Fire missiles and tanks
Israel– go check your stalking
I think we left the check blank
Ukraine– here’s 1.2 billion
But that’s your last one for the year
I know we got you into this mess
But you’d have never guessed things have
Up and changed a little around here
Now the folks back home may be wondering
Can’t we just forget about the wars
If just for one day
I say sure we can, but first we got
some Merry Christmases to say
Merry Christmas first responders and
All you nurses who care
Power plant operators
Folks at work in the air
Merry Christmas train conductors
Folks at work at the zoo
All you volunteers doing what you don’t have to do
And most of all Merry Christmas to you
Merry Christmas
There’s a tree in my house
I’m tired of rocking around
Someone’s big ass socks hanging off of the mantle
The whole subdivisions lit up like a roman candle
I’m testifying now, Santa’s my witness
Jesus Christ help me it’s Christmas
Now nothing gives the holiday it’s festive feel
Like the American tradition of a big arms deal
So let’s see what Uncle Samy Claus has
In a slaying sleigh tonight, shall we
Egypt– under the tree is 5 billion
For Hell Fire missiles and tanks
Israel– go check your stalking
I think we left the check blank
Ukraine– here’s 1.2 billion
But that’s your last one for the year
I know we got you into this mess
But you’d have never guessed things have
Up and changed a little around here
Now the folks back home may be wondering
Can’t we just forget about the wars
If just for one day
I say sure we can, but first we got
some Merry Christmases to say
Merry Christmas first responders and
All you nurses who care
Power plant operators
Folks at work in the air
Merry Christmas train conductors
Folks at work at the zoo
All you volunteers doing what you don’t have to do
And most of all Merry Christmas to you
Merry Christmas
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